Another true FML moment

So I’ve been sick since Monday. I don’t know what the hizeck is up with my body, but my immune system apparently went on vaca. Well I’ve found that flavored hot tea to the soar throat is like angels in heaven singing to baby Jesus. So at about midnight last night, I decided to make… Read More

V.I.P.

You know you’re a baller WHEN: Pizza Hut sends you exclusive “by invitation only” emails. Apparently my opinion matters!!!! So thank you Pizza Hut. I believe that is the only time in the last 6 months anyone has actually asked for my opinion. So yes, I will fill out your survey! Huzzah!

Pure schadenfreude

So I just realized something. There is something ridiculously awesome about seeing one of your ex’s not only date extremely weird looking women, but go incredibly downhill themself. Call me a Jerk. But it feels good. Real good. It’s like eating candy. You know you shouldn’t even look at it or even think about it… Read More

Digging for Gold? Or just Gold Digging…

“Now I ain’t sayin she a gold digger, but she ain’t messin with no broke n****” I dare say that was the most intelligent thing that has come out of the mouth of Kanye West… but not purposely, of course. While I hate to be quoting the man even President Obama considers a “jackass,” he… Read More

I'm really tired of Target rejecting me

I have a beef with Target. No. Not only do I have a beef with Target, I have a beef with all creditors everywhere…but mostly Target. Back in the day, Target would not give me a job. They had a “we’re hiring” sign up, but apparently that doesn’t mean crap. They make you go through… Read More

Reason #546 you shouldn't move back home

Reason #546 you shouldn’t move back home after college. Today I discovered that my hair straightener turns itself back on if I leave it plugged into the wall. Before work I straightened my hair. After work, my mother decided to lecture me about leaving the hair straightener on. I wasn’t having it. I’m 22 years… Read More

Random thought of the day

So as I was getting a glass of water in the kitchen tonight (after battling a giant cockroach perched on the dishwasher EW), I realized something. I have a special cup and I swear to god, everything tastes better in my special cup. Is this weird? I just love this cup. It’s interesting because it’s… Read More

Newest painting

In case anybody is interested, I just finished a painting. Let me know if you want it. My hobbies get the best of me… I was addicted to finishing this the last 3 days or so.

Where's PETA when you need them…

While innocently shopping in Target today, I came across something that kinda made me gag a little… It’s bad enough to subject a human to wearing this (as Planet Smoothie often does), but to make your poor, innocent, helpless dog wear it?! Oh dear Jesus… why is this ok? The best part– “For pets only”……. Read More